I always wanted to hide my story but recently I met a friend and started to learn not to be shy with what's going on with my health and to share more to people. I wrote a long writing on my Knock Knee and I received numbers of people which having the same problem with me, from difference part of world and I know this is important for people to share their knowledge as this is very strange in ASEAN but common sickness in USA and UK. For now, I have done my operation and I will share more in the next post. This is just to recap on what's the background of it.
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I went for a knock knee correction when I was 7 years old which was done in General Hospital KL (Malaysia) and I spent 6 months on bed and few months on rehab (can’t exactly remember how long was it). My legs was perfect at that time and the only negative was my knee will lost their energy out of sudden. I remember I always fell down because of that. Good thing didn’t last, my legs started to go back to it’s original position when I was 8-9 years old.
For friends that know me, they know I been having knee problem for ages and I never actually go and fix it for some reason.
This year, 2017, I have made a very big decision in my life, that’s is to go for another round of operation for my legs. The operation date was on 2 June 2017, and I know I will be having tons of pain and unpredictable challenge from 2 June 2017 onward. To share more about the operation, basically… they will have to cut-open my legs, break my bone, remove a part of my bone and insert a plate as support and only able to walk when the broken part is reconnected. I will be physically immobility for months. The risk of the operation been highlighted by the doctor and it just made my mind blank for a second.
I would say I am ready for the challenge but deep down in my heart, I M SCARE! As mentioned, it’s not the first time and I clearly remember the pain on my last operation.
I been suffering lots of pain because of this pair of legs and recent years, it became a long period thing – such as May 2016 till now. Since the last injuries, I went to see difference type of doctors (Traditional Chinese Medication (“TCM”), orthopedic, Chiropractic, knee specialist, sport injury specialist and rehab doctor and they advise the same…. My question: should I go for the correction operation? Doctor: It’s not a choice for you anymore as your angle is falling out day by day.” I never give up, so I went to consult difference doctors, the best in knee, contacted my friend in all field to get advice, even the specialist in USA, all I gotten is – It’s no longer a choice and it won’t be an easy journey for you. From there, I know I need to get myself ready for something big. I been crying a lot and having lots of inner pain because I just can’t imagine and accept the fact that I need to go thru another round. Sometimes till today, my eyes will roll with tears when I talk about this with friends.
From day to day, I realized the love from my family is ultimate. I m not from a wealthy family but I am rich in love, care, support and understanding. The worried in my heart, the pain in my heart, they have it double or more than that. They have to see me in pain but they can’t do anything, seeing me taking a risk but can’t help. No one talk about it during family dinner, as everyone tears their eyes if it’s mentioned. Thank you can’t express my love toward the family. Lots of love!
Second, my friends. I have tons of thank you in my heart to each one of you who being supportive by my side. If to mention name, I probably need another 2 pages for this, you know who you guys are. From primary till now, each of you count in my heart ! Carried my stuff for me, carried me to class, pick me up from house to classes, looking for medicine for me when I m sick, get me all your extra clothes to cover my knee, buy me lunch, took me out for afternoon tea, make me laugh when you know I have depression and many many more! Seriously, I can’t stop counting on the goods! You guys have no obligation to me but you guys just did so much extra for a friend ! Thank you !
Third, those that make me grow. Without you guys, I won’t be strong enough to stand in the storm. Thank you !
Fourth, all the doctors and bosses that gave me advice. I even being lecture by numbers of doctors and my direct boss in EY on what’s number 1 and what’s number 2.
Last but the most important person, Jesus. For the past 1 year, I blame God and asking him, why me? There are so many evil out there but why me? I don’t do evil but why me? For a year, the same question and I started to have hate in my heart. Then I learnt, take a step back and look … HEY! You are having the best knee doctor, best orthopedic, physiotherapy, TCM doctor, understanding boss, caring family, supportive friends and helping hands around! If HE doesn’t bless me with all these…. Can’t imagine.
Please keep me in your prayer and remember me in your heart if this become my last word!
If you want to know more about knock knee/ bow knee, need to know which doctor to go for if you have difference case, you may PM me. I am willing to help.
